After more than six years on a spiritual journey, I have learned something important. Awakening does not mean you never struggle again. It does not mean you are immune to negative thoughts, comparison, or moments of self-doubt.
Even now, there are days when I feel misaligned, when my mind spirals into thoughts of lack, comparison, self-pity, and harsh self-judgment. Yesterday was one of those days.
My thoughts felt heavy and relentless. I kept circling the same story: “My life is a failure. Everything feels like a mess.” The more I believed it, the lower my mood sank, until I eventually broke down.
The difference now, compared to years ago, is awareness. Through consistent spiritual practice, I am able to catch myself sooner and gently shift out of the rut instead of staying stuck for days or weeks. That is why I wanted to share a simple and practical tool that has helped me many times, the “Choose Again” method by Gabby Bernstein.
The 3-Step Choose Again Method
Step 1: Notice the thought
When you are in a low mood, the first step is to notice what is happening in your mind and body. What thought is looping? What energy are you carrying?
For me, it was the belief that my life was somehow behind or wrong. Once I noticed that thought clearly, I wrote it down in my journal.
This step is powerful because writing creates distance. You begin to see the thought for what it is, a mental pattern rather than the ultimate truth.
Step 2: Forgive the thought
Next comes compassion. Instead of judging yourself for having a negative thought, you forgive yourself for having it.
Beside the thought in my journal, I wrote:
“Thank you for revealing to me what I do not want, so that I can clarify what I do want.”
This step softens the inner resistance. It acknowledges that the mind is simply doing what it was conditioned to do, trying to protect, compare, or control. Forgiveness creates space for a shift.
Step 3: Choose again
Now comes the reframe, but gently. You are not trying to jump from despair into blind positivity. You are simply choosing the next best-feeling thought, one that feels believable and grounded.
To replace my original thought, I wrote:
“I am constantly learning and growing, and the universe always has my back.”
That felt true enough to calm my nervous system and steady my emotions.
Why this works
This method closely mirrors principles from Cognitive Behaviour Therapy. Our thoughts influence our emotions, which then shape our actions.
If I had continued believing that my life was a failure, my low mood would likely have led to self-sabotaging behaviours such as overeating, numbing out on screens, or withdrawing from life. The coping mechanisms may differ from person to person, but the cycle is often the same. One negative thought fuels another.
By choosing a better-feeling thought, we interrupt that loop. We shift not just our mindset, but also our energy and behaviour.
A gentle reminder
Many spiritual teachings remind us that negative thoughts arise from the ego, the part of the mind that seeks identity, comparison, and control. Dissolving ego patterns is a lifelong practice, and none of us are exempt from moments of misalignment.
So if you find yourself in a low mood, be gentle with yourself. Awareness does not mean perfection. It means returning to alignment sooner and with more compassion each time.
The next time your thoughts feel heavy, try this 3-Step Choose Again Method. Falling out of alignment does not mean you have failed. It simply means you are human.